Eden Hill Journal

Ramblings and memories of an amateur wordsmith and philosopher

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Location: Maine, United States

Tuesday, May 05, 2009

Bad Boy Bad Boy

I have been a bad boy.
Let me explain...
A few years ago someone found one of my email accounts and assumed I was somebody else, that I was the pastor of a church, their church. Recently I've been receiving emails from these people, I'll call them Betty and Ken for lack of a better name. Last week they sent me one that was a "Powerful wake up call" about how the Muslim population growth is going to take over the planet. America's fertility rate can't sustain our culture. Here's the YouTube video. Did you know that France will be an Islamic republic in just 39 years? America's fertility rate is 1.6
Well anyway, this week they sent me an email about some movie due out this summer that portrays Jesus as a homosexual. Here are the contents of that message:
*****
The movie Corpus Christi is due to be released this June to> August.??> > This disgusting film set to appear in America later this> year and it depicts Jesus and his disciples as homosexuals!> As a play, this has already been in theatres for a while.> It's called Corpus Christi ' which means 'The> Body of Christ'.? ?It's a revolting mockery of our> Lord. But, we can make a difference. That's why I am> sending this e-mail to you. If you do send this around, we> may be able to prevent this film from showing in America and> South Africa .?> > Apparently, some regions in Europe have already banned the> film. We need a lot of prayers and a lot of e-mails.> > As a Christian I want to take a stand in what I believe in> and stop the mockery of Jesus Christ our Savior.?> > At the risk of a bit of inconvenience, I'm forwarding> this to all I think would appreciate it. Please help us> prevent such offenses against our Lord. It will take you> less than 2 minutes to pass it on.?> > ?If you are not interested,? or do not have the 2 Minutes> it will take to do this , please don't complain when God> does not have time for you, because He is far busier than we> are..?> > Remember, Jesus said 'Deny Me on earth and I'll> deny you before my Father'?> > > > > > > ?> > > > > > ?> > > > A Good Credit Score is 700 or Above. See yours in just 2> easy steps!
*****
Well for some reason I felt compelled to email Ken and Betty back. Here's what I wrote:
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Betty and Ken,After some brief research about the movie that your email claims will be released this summer, I discovered the probability that the the contents of your email were false. Bearing false witness is not only a sin, it is evidence that you are serving as an agent of Satan and as such, will not be spending eternity with God and Jesus and myself in Heaven. To confirm this, could you look into the truthfulness of this email which you sent me and if you find it to be false (as I have found), could you please issue me a sincere appology and ensure me that you will never do anything like this again?On the other hand, if this actually is a film coming out this summer, could you poosibly notify Snopes.com and have them correct thair error?Bill Walden
*****
I should have spell-checked it.
Well Betty and Ken didn't like this email very much. They didn't apologize for it. Here is their reply:
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We cannot believe this was sent from you. Assuming that is was, this is my response. The only apology I owe you is that I forwarded an email to you. I did NOT believe that email, I thought, you as a Pastor would be interested in what is going around on the internet. I am not computer savvy and don’t even know what “Snopes” is. I have to say that your response was very unkind and hurt both me and Ken deeply. We took it as a personal attack. We have been faithful attendees at Cornerstone for 13 years, supporting your ministry and you don’t even know us, thinking that we are serving as agents of Satan! Unbelievable!!!! As of this email we will no longer be coming to Cornerstone. Ken and Betty [redacted]
*****
Well now, that is sad, isn't it? Betty and Ken were so hurt by Pastor Bill that they will no longer be attending or supporting Pastor Bill and his ministry. I felt moved, so I wrote this reply:
*****
Hahahahaaa!!!! That is hilarious!!!One suggestion, though. Give your pastor a call first.Sincerely,The other Bill Walden (?)LOLOh, and do your homework next time and figure out what Snopes.com is before you forward any more of these lies. God didn't give you a brain just to time your farts with.
*****
I am a bad, bad boy.

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